I used to have a life

On the return trip from Renegade Brooklyn I realized that I used to have a life outside of work. When I started Pistachio Press my main goal was to have a self-sustaining career that I loved with more flexibility than other jobs...this is the reason most small businesses begin, right? Well, in the last few months I've worked 60-80 hours/week, said no when friends ask me to hang out, stopped going for walks with my dogs, started living on Mountain Dew, answer work email at midnight, ignore my husband, and let my house get to an almost irreparable state of disorganization. This was never my ultimate goal.

My very high expectations led me to work my butt off preparing for Renegade {as did my sister and husband}, only to have a severe thunderstorm overhead for much of the first day followed by a three-hour traffic jam during which I was sitting in my underwear, wrapped in a sheet because I could no longer wear my dripping jeans. To say I was disheartened would be an understatement. But, the next day turned out to be nice and I met with some of my favorite vendors {more to follow on this subject}. My spirits were especially lifted when Julie from Etui came back smiling even though her tent blew away during the storm {see missing tent in first photo}. And it was awesome sharing a beautiful tent with Shanna and working on our card collaboration during the last few weeks.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that although it was a bit rough, I learned a few valuable lessons. I now know where my priorities are and I'm going to try very very hard to work a 40-hour week. Organization will be the key. I'm also going to try to build in some time for myself. My masseuse gave me the suggestion to take a 15 minute break to stretch or sit quietly a few times each day {after I stopped crying during the intake before I even got the massage}. I also know why second storie is so awesome...we always hold our events inside, we try to greet each vendor to make everyone feel welcome, and we would definitely warn our vendors if a giant thunderstorm was going to sit on top of the event. I'm also going to try to start writing my blog again...but this time it's for me. I like reading what I've done in the past year {like my very first listing on Etsy} and I really hope that weekly writing on the blog will help give me a bit of focus and time for reflection. And maybe the next time someone asks how I'm doing I can honestly answer "Great! I just got back from the park and now I'm going to make dinner with my amazing husband."


Anonymous said...

So sweet. . . your puppies do miss you. They've been telling Barkley that they feel like latch key dogs.

shanna said...

well said, friend. sorry to hear you had tears at kurt's, but i'm sure they were for the best.

i hope you're feeling better.

p.s. happy anniversary!

megan said...

its nice to know we're all thinking the same things. You'll be so much happier when you start trying to balance more, plus you'll be more excited about making art.

Sorry we didn't get to hang out more at Renegade. And you're right, second storie is awesome - small, intimate setting, great little group of vendors - thats the right way to do a show!

marc said...

well, you had fun, right? because it's always about fun and laughing about the things you can't control. like rain. and traffic. life wouldn't be worth living if everything was always perfect.

Anonymous said...

I love your blog, I read it all of the time and I really love this entry.

Your entry comes from a really honest and human place. It gives people like me, whose lives can sometimes seem to be spinning out of control, a little company. It’s nice to know that I’m not alone while I struggle to hold it all together.

I wish I could have been at the show to see your work in person. It’s beautiful on screen but I know it doesn’t hold a candle to the real thing. It’s things like Renegade that make Canada feel a lot farther away than it is.

I’m really looking forward to seeing how this great new plan works out for you.


Rachael said...

Thanks for the great comments everyone. I really have learned so much in the past few weeks and these experiences have been crucial to me growing as a person.

Micheline, thank you so much for your kind words. I had been a bit nervous about making such a personal post, but it makes me so happy to know that others can relate. Don't worry, Canada's not so far away, and the internet brings everything closer!

Nancy Topolski delicately perched said...

I have missed your regular posts, but of course understand what life can be sometimes. I take one day at a time. You can't do more than that. One hour at a time if necessary. But you know that keeping the blog or any kind of journal will help remind you of who you are and what you want and get you to the places you want to go.
Hey, for today - go over to The South Wedge Market and treat yourself to a nice salad with edible flowers, homebaked bread and coconut sorbet for dessert.
Keep up the great work Rachael - you are spectacular!

Maggie said...

I'm just catching up to this post a little late...but wanted to chime in on the it's-hard-to-balance front - the saving grace is that you get to do work you love, but those moments when you find yourself turning down friends' invitations are rough ones, no question. Your work is beautiful, and I'm glad you're finding ways to make it work well for you!